Well, you know the times when you feel completely drained, and when it feels that nothing seems to be going the way "I had planned". So, I started doing what no addict should do...I started thinking about an escape. Not really planning to actually escape, but just wondering if just one last time it would be okay...to have a farewell to addiction. I didn't want to call a friend/sponsor because I really knew the answer. I decided to turn to a perfect unbiased source...SIRI. Yes, I got my device and asked Siri if it would be okay to make a choice I really shouldn't make just ONE LAST time. In my mind, I must admit it sounded like a good idea, but her response was: "I cannot help you with that". Truth is, she couldn't. Now it was MY turn to really see for myself the answer. Addiction is tough! It is nearly a continual vise that doesn't like to go away. We all know the answer. One last time NEVER happens. Because it starts back a terrible, controlling force that makes us feel defeated and lost. So, naturally, we keep on doing wrong because it "doesn't matter now" or because we feel a loss of control. Each day we become stronger. Yes, thoughts enter our minds about the "what ifs" and so forth. That's when it's time to do what I like to do with a crying baby or toddler. I use the "art of distraction". Do anything to distract a sad or yucky feeling for a better one. It worked for my big baby self! Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute we can overcome our addictions. It can happen, and one day, the thoughts will fade, and desires will change. Being patient and smart is so important. Do not rationalize any wrong choice. A wrong choice is just that. WRONG! Distract your mind, your thoughts and your focus. We can do this!
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